me a chance to step back and reflect and after a while, month or two, i start liking you a little bit again, remembering the friendship. third of all, since i'm not looking at you, and you're not irritating me so much, i have a chance to look in the mirror and see what maybe i had to do with these problems. that can be constructive. >> quick tips if you're thinking about doing this, first of all, has to be a mutual decision. >> a decision, not storming out in anger, where are we going to go, who is going to go, what about the kids. >> needless to say not a time to date others. >> not only needless to say you're not going over there girlfriend, we're working on it and staying married. number three, we're communicating, talking to each other. maybe we're dating, a physical relationship, but we're in contact. number four, confidentiality, people know we're separated but everybody doesn't have to know why because they are going to remember when you and i are together. >> don't dish to friends. friends always remember long after you've forgotten. >> so does your mother.